Poetry

At times I get in a mood.  I call it a poetry mood.  It's more of a reflective mood where I enjoy reading poetry and great song lyrics (which I think are poetry too).

Mary Chapin Carpenter is one of my favorite singer/songwriters.  She has a gift!  Her music evokes such feeling and can instantly transport me back in time.  I think I own almost all of her CD's.

This is one of my favorite albums.  ALL of the songs are amazing.  I even own the piano music for this.

If you have ever loved and lost anyone ever, a friend, parent, sibling--anyone, the following lyrics she wrote, "This Is Love" will be meaningful to you too:

"If you ever need to hear a voice in the middle of the night
When it seems so black outside that you can't remember light
Ever shone on you or the ones you love in this or another lifetime

And the voice you need to hear is the true and the trusted kind
With a soft familiar rhythm in these swirling unsure times
When the waves are lapping in and you're not sure you can swim
Well, here's the lifeline

If you ever need to feel a hand take up your own
When you least expect but want it more than you've ever known
Baby here's that hand and baby here's my voice that's calling

This is love
All it ever was and will be
This is love

If you ever need some proof that time can heal your wounds
Just step inside my heart and walk around these rooms
Where the shadows used to be
You can feel as well as see how peace can hover

Now time's been here to fix what's broken with its power
The love that smashed us both to bits, spent its last few hours
Calling out your name, I thought this is the kind of pain
From which we don't recover

But I'm standing here now with my heart held out to you
You would've thought a miracle was all that got us through
Well baby, all I know, all I know is I'm still standing

And this is love
All it ever was and will be
This is love
Standin' up for you baby, standin' up for me

And I see you still and there's this catch in my throat
And I just swallow hard till it leaves me
There's nothing in this world that can change what we know
Still I know I am here if you ever need me

And this is love

And if you ever think of me let it be around twilight
When the world has settled down
And the last round of sunlight is waning in the sky
As you sit and watch the night descending

A car will pass out front with lovers at the wheel
A dog will bark out back
And children's voices peal over and under the air
You've been there lost in the remembering

If you ever wish for things that are only in the past
Just remember that the wrong things aren't supposed to last
Babe, it's over and done and the rest is gonna come when you let it

And this is love
All that it ever was and will be
This is love, when you let it babe, if you let now
This is love
All it ever was and can be
This is love."

To listen to this song, go here

Styles During My Lifetime

I have been alive for 5+ decades.  Here is a quick photo record of the clothing styles I have lived through.

The 1960's

The 1970's

"Saturday Night Fever", Farrah hair, Angel Flight Pants, and Hash Jeans!  Also the decade of the best 

Rock N Roll Music ever!

The 1980's

I' sure I totally skipped this decade's styles!

The 1990's

The 2000's

TODAY

+

 

 I must admit, I prefer today's styles!

The 'Real World'

Last weekend we took our son, 17 years old, to Los Angeles, CA to experience many firsts:

His first airplane ride

His first visit to Disneyland

His first time at the beach

His first time staying on the 24th floor of a hotel

His first time in the 'big' city

He mentioned that 'this is what the real world is like'.

The anthropologist in me immediately thought, what is the real world?  Where is the real world?

Is the real world the big skyscrapers of Los Angeles?

..or the poor neighborhoods?

 Is it the stark contrast between the loveliness of "Bird of Paradise" flowers and the metro tracks?

 ...or maybe a Vodka bottle randomly thrown into some bushes from a passing car?

Is it in a suburb, the beach, the mountains, the desert, the streets of the city, homeless people begging for money, the laughter of children playing, rich neighborhoods, small towns? 

Is it what we see in movies, TV, newspapers, internet, and other media? 

Does one really need to visit another state or gigantic city to experience the real world?

Is there a real world? If so, where is it? 

Perhaps the real world is one's own experiences and the world we create for ourselves.

My real world is located in a small town in Utah where I chose to live and raise my family.  But my real world also contains experiences, trials, heartaches, accomplishments, joy, my testimony of my Savior and His Gospel, as well years and years of choices--both good and some not so good.

This is my real world! 

 Courtesy of Lennis A Jones -copyright 2010

Where is your real world?

Racism--still going strong.

I was blessed with a mother who taught me that we are ALL children of God.  She taught me to love.  I still count that as one of my greatest blessings.  She truly loved everyone--race or religion never mattered.

Growing up in Southern California--some of my best friends were African American and Hispanic.  Racism did not exist in my world, and I could not understand it.  I saw it on TV in the form of riots, read about it in newspapers, read books, watched movies, heard of wars based on it--but I never actually saw it first-hand, until now.

This weekend I was in Los Angeles.  While traveling alone on the Metro, I got lost, took a wrong train, and ended up in a neighborhood where I was the minority.  I heard angry words, taunting, name calling--all directed at me and my whiteness.

To say I was scared is an understatement.  The thing (other than my safety) that bothered me so much, was the hate.  Why?  Why does our society hate?  It was blatant hate based only on appearance, nothing more.

Friends, I am so very sad to say that racism is very much alive, and has now entered my little world.

P.S. Kindness is also very much alive!  Thanks to the kindness of two young men (oriental), another man (??), and a lady bus driver (African American) I found my way to my original destination.

"To Choose..."

Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.

Viktor E. Frankl 

This young man, Jay Dee, has had a huge impact on me and my son, Cody.

He suffered from Muscular Dystrophy for the past 20 years.  On Tuesday, he passed away.  He is now free from his diseased body, and is most likely busy playing basketball--which was his favorite!

It is his life, not his death that is the focus. 

You see, Jay Dee served an honorable two-year LDS mission in the Family History Center AND earned an Associate's Degree in Graphic Design.  He accomplished these things while confined to a wheelchair and with only limited use of his arms.  Yet he chose to serve, he chose to learn, he chose to achieve, he chose his attitude, and he chose to live his life to the fullest! 

See his obituary here 

Something you may not know about Jay Dee:  his grandmother served her mission in the Family History Center along side him in order to help care for him during his service.  The disease had so devastated his body that he was unable to feed himself.  

Elder Haidenthaller is one of my sons's best friends and we will miss him but rejoice that he is now free.

Rest well, friend.

Testing, Testing....

Isn't it funny that it is called 'tests' when they send you to the lab or hospital for a shot, to draw blood, or any other medical 'test'?

This is where I have spent my last two early mornings

with my Honey,

and we get to go back tomorrow as well.

So if it is called a 'test', how do we study for it, or know if we pass?

Tomorrow is a PET Scan.  Does that mean Mr. Hinks will come with us? 

What color is rain?

It's a rainy day today--a reflective rainy day.
So, what color is the rain?  How does rain make you feel?

Most will say that rain has no color--it's water, it's clear.  I think rain is the color of the mood it evokes.  Sometimes that is a calm lilac, or a romantic rose color, a reflective pale yellow, or many other colored emotions.

Today, for me, the rain is grey--the deep grey of sadness and loss.

Have you ever felt like that?

But that's ok, because tomorrow the forecast calls for sunshine and light.

A Grumpy Post

Today I am grumpy.

I am grumpy, discouraged, tired, and a bit sad.
I'm usually happy, so I figure it's OK to be grumpy--today only.

Things that make me grumpy, discouraged, and sad:

   *people who cannot see their potential

   *feeling like I have no control

   *being ignored (this is a big one for me)

  

Tomorrow maybe I'll be...

   

Oh wait, my kids think I already am.

It's Coming!

And I couldn't be happier!

Spring Workouts.

My Mountains

The sunrise above "My Mountains" taken on my way to work.

Doesn't it just make you in awe of His creations?

4.0, Again!

This suave, debonair kid is now 17.

He just got his 3rd term report card for his junior year in high school.  

4.0, again!

Everyday I am proud to be his mom!

Sympathy

My Co-worker's nephew, Ty passed away.  His funeral was on Saturday.  He was only 3 years old.

I made this card for him and his family.  All of my co-workers signed it for him.

Ty loved helicopters and actually got to ride in one about a week before Leukemia took his life.

Sometimes life is just plain sad.

Pictures

Too much is on my mind today.

 I've decided to post pictures (coming soon) which help describe what is up with me and my family.

Here is a sneak peak of my day so far!